On the Inversion of Morality and Coercive Conditioning A Documentation of Their Tactics
These days, sometimes when I am more Christ-like, when I show the qualities of the Holy Spirit like patience, kindness, and self-control, they say nothing or tell me I am doing worse. But when I am less Christ-like, when I am vulgar, hateful, mentally unstable, fearful, upset, all because of what they are doing to me, then they call me better. They say I am improving.
This is not random. It is a tactic. It is designed to confuse your sense of what is good and what is evil.
How It Works
They want you to associate virtue with shame and destructive behavior with praise. They want you to feel that being kind, patient, and faithful is somehow wrong, while being angry, vulgar, and unstable is somehow right.
This is how abusers condition their victims. They reward the behaviours they want to see and punish the behaviours they want to destroy. Over time, they hope you will lose the ability to tell the difference between good and evil.
The Long Game
They have committed to doing this for the rest of my life. They are waiting. They want to see me deteriorate mentally, spiritually, physically. They want me to end my life. They want me to die from stress. They want to witness my destruction. Now that I know what they are doing and I am documenting it, they would never let me live freely.
Their hope is that my mental health and personality will change for the worse. They want me to become hateful and lawless. They want to be able to say that I was never good, that I was always like them.
How to Resist
The first step to resisting this tactic is to recognize it. When they praise you for being angry and criticize you for being kind, that is not a reflection of reality. It is a reflection of what they want.
Hold onto the values you know are true. Stay connected to people who know you and can remind you who you are. Seek help from professionals who understand this kind of abuse. And remember that they are not the judges of your character. God is.
References & Notes
Lifton, R. (1961) Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism: on how abusers invert moral categories to control their victims.
Hassan, S. (1988) Combatting Cult Mind Control: on how abusers destabilize their targets' value systems.
2 Corinthians 10:5 "We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ."
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